Your keyboard sees every password you type.Ours can’t send them anywhere.
Somewhere on your phone is a torch that wanted your contacts and a note-taking app that wanted an account. We got tired of it and wrote our own. Ten of them. Each one does its job and holds nothing it does not need for that job.
And the calculator has no internet permission at all, because a calculator has no business holding one. You do not have to believe either sentence: install one, open Settings › Apps › Permissions, and read what Android prints. That list is written by Google, not by our marketing department, and it would happily embarrass us if we deserved it.
Notes App zero permissionsPlayer App no internet permissionWeather App no location permissionCalculator App vibrate, and that’s it
The rule
A calculator has no business holding a network socket.
Ours doesn’t have one. Neither does the music player, the recorder or the notepad — not as policy, but because the permission was never asked for, and an app cannot use what it was never granted. Every company on earth writes “we respect your privacy” on a page like this one. Nobody publishes the list. Here it is, in the same words Android will print on your own phone.
AppEverything it is allowed to do
NotesNothing. The permission list is empty.
CalculatorVibrate.
PlayerShow a playback notification and keep playing in the background. No internet.
RecorderUse the microphone and keep recording in the background. No internet.
VideoInternet, for streams. Files come in through Android’s picker — no storage permission.
WeatherInternet, check the connection, restart the widget after a reboot. No location.
FrequencyMicrophone, for the tuner and the level meter. No internet. Nothing is recorded.
ClockVibrate, wake the screen for a ringing alarm, restart alarms after a reboot, exact alarms. Internet only if you switch remote alerts on — off by default.
KeyboardVibrate. No internet — nothing you type ever leaves the phone.
BrowserInternet, plus camera, microphone and location held on behalf of the sites you visit — the app itself never uses them, and every site still has to ask you.
Where the job genuinely needs the network, it gets the network: a browser fetches pages, a video player pulls a stream, a forecast has to come from somewhere. What we will not do is hand a socket to an app that has no honest use for one, then ask you to trust our intentions about it.
Start here
Nobody lies awake about a calculator.
They lie awake about the thing that reads every message they write. Ten apps sit below, all built to the same rule. If you only ever take one off this page, take the keyboard.
Every password you have typed. Every card number. Every message you thought twice about before sending, and every one you didn’t. All of it went through a keyboard, which makes it the most privileged app you own — and the one almost nobody thinks to check.
Your typing stays on the phone. The app holds no internet permission, so there is no socket for a keystroke to leave through — correction, suggestions, the sixty languages and the clipboard all happen on the device. The list on your phone settles this, not the paragraph you are reading.
Sixty languages built in — switch on the ones you use, the spacebar cycles them
Autocorrect and suggestions run offline, from a dictionary in the app
Clipboard keeps everything you copy until you clear it
Undo/redo on the bar, password-manager fill, no ads on your keys
€9.99v1.73vibrate only
The rest of the line-up
Nine more. The whole phone, covered.
Each one is worth installing on what it does — gapless playback, request-level ad blocking, VLC’s engine, a widget that never asks for GPS. The boundaries come as standard. Take one, take three, take all ten.
Pages load with the ads, the trackers and the cookie banner already gone. Not hidden after the fact — dropped before the page draws.
98,000-domain ad and tracker list, bundled in the app
Consent banners rejected and dismissed for you, automatically
Reader mode strips an article back to text on black
Tabs restored on launch. No account, no sync, no profile
Your history has nowhere to go. We run no account system, no sync service and no profile of you, so there is no server of ours for the browser to report to. It talks to the sites you visit and to nothing else.
For music you actually own. Point it at a folder of files and it builds the library itself, no scanning service, no account, no matching your collection against a catalogue.
Gapless — live albums and mixes run without the hole between tracks
Graphic EQ, and volume levelling so one track doesn’t blow your ears off
Shuffle, repeat, queue, lock-screen and headphone controls
Scan a folder and it builds the library from your own files
It cannot reach the internet. Not “won’t” — cannot. The permission is absent, so Android refuses the connection on our behalf whether we wanted it or not.
Built on VLC’s engine, driven with one thumb. If it is a video file, it plays, and you will not meet the words “unsupported format”.
Every codec and container VLC handles — no “unsupported format”
Subtitles, audio tracks, speed, aspect, rotation
Swipe for volume, brightness and seek; tap to pause
Plays off the network too — SMB, NFS, HTTP, FTP
Internet, and that is the list. Streams need it. Your own files arrive through Android’s picker, one at a time, chosen by you — which is why it never asks for the run of your storage.
You write it, it is written. No spinner, no “sign in to continue”, no first-run tour of a note-taking app.
Saves the moment you leave a note; nothing to remember
Search and favourites for when the list gets long
Share any note straight out to anything else
Opens instantly — no loading, no first-run account
The permission list is empty. Not short — empty. There is nothing for you to grant it and nothing you could take away later if you changed your mind about us.
Opens, adds up, gets out of the way — then lets you change any number in the sum without retyping the rest.
Every line on the tape stays live: edit a number and everything built on it recalculates
Tap a result to reference it as #1, #2 in the line you are typing
Square root, powers, logs, trigonometry in degrees, radians or gradians
Live preview as you type, running total, your separators and theme
Vibrate. The buzz under your thumb. That is the entire permission list for this app, and it is the one we would point at first if you only believed one thing on this page.
Alarms that ring when you set them to, even on a phone deep in Doze. Plus a world clock, a stopwatch and a timer.
Alarms use Android’s own alarm-clock slot — on the minute, even in Doze
World clock: type your town, it works the zone out and keeps your name for it
Ten tones written for this app — no licensed loop you have heard elsewhere
Stopwatch with laps, timer with a countdown ring, both with shade controls
Nothing to sign into. Your alarms sit in the phone’s own scheduler and survive a reboot. There is an internet permission and we will not pretend otherwise: it serves remote alerts, it ships switched off, and if you never turn it on it is never used.
A tone generator and a set of ears. Play a frequency, or measure the one already in the room.
Sine, square and triangle at any frequency, plus binaural and isochronic modes
Libraries built in — Solfeggio, Rife, Schumann, planetary, chakras, brainwaves
Musical notes at Concert A, Scientific C, Otto 128 or Megalithic tuning
Tuner with pitch detection, FFT spectrum, and a sound-level meter
Microphone only, and no internet. The mic feeds the tuner and the level meter in real time. Nothing is written to a file, and with no network permission there is nowhere for it to be sent even if it were.
The week ahead on your home screen, from an app that has never once asked where you are.
Home-screen widget, and the full week when you tap it
Temperature, feels-like, humidity, UV, sunrise and sunset
Save the places you care about, switch between them
°C or °F, wind units and refresh rate are yours to set
No location permission. Your GPS is closed to it. It knows the name of the town you typed in, and it is fairly hard to build a profile out of the word “Cork”.
The apps come from Google Play; the unlock key comes from us. Two things, two directions, and it is worth knowing that before you pay rather than at eleven at night wondering what you have just bought.
1 · The app
Install it from Google Play the ordinary way, on the phone you want it on. Nothing unusual happens here.
2 · The key
You buy the key here, and it is in your inbox the moment the payment clears — it also sits on your account page permanently, so losing the email costs you nothing. Open the app, find Unlock in its menu, type the key once. It never asks again, and each key covers two devices.
3 · The keyboard warning
Switch on any keyboard and Android tells you it may be able to collect all the text you type, including passwords and credit card numbers. It prints that for every keyboard ever written, ours and the biggest companies alive, because Android cannot tell which ones actually do it. Read it as the warning it is — then read the permission list underneath, which is the only place the answer has ever been.
No account with us past your email address and your keys, no telemetry consent screen, no analytics SDK sitting in the corner. And the claim on this page is checkable ninety seconds after the app is on the phone: Settings, Apps, Permissions, written by Android and not by us.
Build yours
Pick a few, or take the lot.
Tap an app above and it drops onto the phone. Take one, take the ones you want, or take the lot and stop thinking about it.
Your phone, as you want it.
Tap an app to drop it in.
Every other answer to this problem bills you monthly. A privacy VPN is €60 to €100 a year, for as long as you keep caring, and it does nothing whatsoever about the keyboard reading your messages. Pay us once and we are done. There is no second payment because we did not build anything that needs one.
Prices in
Fourteen days to change your mind. Say the word inside two weeks and the money goes back. No form to find, no questionnaire about why you are leaving, no offer of a discount to stay.
€0nothing picked yet — tap the apps you want
The Suite covers all of them, and everything we add later — .
That address was made for this order and nothing else, so nobody has to work out whose payment is whose. Your keys are emailed on the first confirmation, and you can close this page as soon as it is sent. This quote holds for 40:00.
Not buying today? Audit the phone you already have.
We wrote down the seven questions we ask before an app goes anywhere near one of our phones — what to look for in the permission list, which permissions are worth an argument, and the three that almost nobody thinks to check. It takes about ten minutes on a phone you already own, it costs nothing, and you may not need us at the end of it.
One email with the audit in it, then roughly one a fortnight on the same subject — what an app can reach, what the platform actually enforces, what changed in Android this month. Unsubscribe link on every one, and we never pass your address to anyone.
Straight answers
The questions we actually get.
What does it cost?
Weather is free. The other nine each carry a price: Calculator €2.99. Notes and Recorder €3.99. Clock €4.99. Browser, Video and Frequency €6.99. Keyboard and Player €9.99. That is €56.91 if you buy them separately. The Suite is €30 for all of them plus everything we add later. Either way it is one payment — no subscription, no renewal notice next year, and no screen inside an app asking you to upgrade.
Do the apps phone home?
Six of them cannot. Player, Recorder, Notes, Calculator, Frequency and the Keyboard hold no internet permission, so Android refuses on their behalf — whatever you type, record or measure has no way off the phone. Browser, Video and Weather do use the network, because fetching a page, a stream and a forecast is the job you bought them for — and Weather manages it without ever touching your GPS, since you type the town in yourself. The Clock holds one too, and it is for remote alerts you switch on yourself: leave it off, which is how it ships, and it never opens a connection.
How do I install them?
Android only. The apps come from Google Play and install like anything else; the unlock key comes from us by email and you type it into the app once. The whole thing is spelled out in what buying and installing actually looks like. There is no iPhone version and we are not going to promise you a date for one.
What is the key for?
It is what you are actually buying. The app comes off Google Play, the key unlocks it — open the app, tap Unlock in the menu, type it in once. Each key covers two devices, a reinstall on a phone you already activated does not use the second one, and every key you own is listed on your account page for as long as you want it. The three steps are above.
What if I don’t like one?
Tell us inside fourteen days and the money goes back, on the app or on the whole set. No form to hunt for, no questionnaire, and we will not counter-offer you a discount to stay. If one of them is not for you we would rather know than keep your €3.99.
Why should I trust you rather than them?
Don’t. Trust is the wrong instrument here and asking for it is what everyone else does. What we have instead is a list you can read on your own phone, written by Android and not by us, and an app cannot use a permission it does not hold no matter what its owners intend. That is the whole argument. If the list ever stops matching what is on this page, you will not need us to tell you.
Do they update themselves?
Updates arrive through Google Play like everything else on the phone, and Play’s own setting decides whether that happens on its own or waits for you to tap it. Your key does not expire and a new version never asks you to pay again. The version numbers on this page are what we are shipping today.
Who’s behind it?
A small crew in Ireland who got tired of watching a calculator ask for an account and an alarm clock report to head office. We are not a big company and there is no round of funding behind this — which cuts both ways, and you should weigh it. Everything we hold on you is on this page: your name, your email, and which apps you chose.
